Happy 13 Week Birthday!

Snork,

Yay! No matter what way you slice it this is definitely the second trimester. It is is 7.30 pm and I am just starting to feel a bit more human. Had some chicken noodle and it was yummy. Had to trudge off to class for a test and it was all a bit swirly but hopefully I did decently. Love you, honey bunny, keep on getting big and strong.

Mums

Yup....still sick

And the continuous flow of snot from my nose down to my stomach has reactivated morning sickness! Oh and Chris had unexpected trip to New Orleans until Friday. Not a good day. Not at all.

still so sick:(

Snork,

I hate feeling so badly and I can't get anything done! I hope you don't feel as badly as I do. Daddy been taking care of me as best he can and this kind of nerd stuff cheering me up a bit:

You

So cutetastic:

It's A Boy! (Probably)

SNORKUS!

You have a flagpole! Looks like my intuition was completely off and you are to be a jumping, mosh-pitting, rough and tumble BOY. :) It is not 100% but the tech said she would be very surprised if with the angle of your do-dads you were a girl.

I was shocked! But so happy. My whole life I've wanted a little boy because I've always had the most wonderful time hanging out with little boys and now I am to have my very own! Then the last year or so I thought I'd want a girl first but now it all seems to make sense in the big plan. You will be the protective older brother:) Your father is absolutely beaming, too.

I will post your ultrasound pictures in a bit but for now here is the first gender-specific outfit we bought for our little rockstar (btw, you were totally rocking and rolling in there today too and the tech commented on how active you are...oh I have my work cut out for me don't I?)



little cut off put they are long striped pants! totally Talking Heads rock!

So that puts it at two girls (me, miette) and five boys (chris, you, onion, sprout, mr. burns) in the household. Oh goodness!

For Chris

Since he loves this song so much:



Actually he hates it because he thinks Angela Landsbury is being such a condescending shrew and it makes me laugh. From "Bedknobs and Broomsticks" btw.

The voice says we should get out here and wait

Snork,

Daddy returned bearing wellness gifts and floral beauties:



And maybe the best present of all time...



Courtney and I loved this movie as a kid and the little girl looks exactly like me as a kid which is awesome. I think I loved it because the kids had magical powers and could communicate with the animals. And of course, the best part of all (Ethan and our ex-vampire roommate Bill should remember this part):




The disc includes "The Return From Witch Mountain" which I have never seen! We are doing a Witch Mountain marathon. Go crazy Saturday night! :)

We love what's in the tums,

Kelly

Felled

Snork,

As you know I was just starting to feel better after getting to the 12 week mark and then suddenly I am felled by illness! Terrible sore throat, upset stomach, flushed. No Fair :(

At least Daddy comes home today and I will be taken care of.

-Sicko

Dancin down on life with agility

Snork,

Had a lovely day with Alicia AND I got to hear your heartbeat at the doctor's office. The nurse placed the doppler on my tummy and your church bells rang clear from the start. She seemed surprised that it was so easy to find this early on, and said "it must be a girl!" Apparently in her experience girl heartbeats are easier to find but who knows! I saw the cutest Christmas dresses in the Gymboree and Jack and Janie store today. Alicia was a champ and came along and oogled them with me. I got her a little stuffed lamb for being such a star. THEN I got my hari krishna done! My hair that is. It is so cold here and it reminds me of Christmas and goodness and love and I am so happy!


I call this my cinnamon cookie hair! Rich chocolate/red brown and blonde. Yummy! It matches the little gold fleck in my left eye. Love the bangs too: all sweepy!


Love the effect she made with the color!

Hair: check
Eyebrows: check
Skin: grumble grumble

Loves,
Kelly

A Diamond Is Forever,

Ok people calm down no I am NOT engaged. I know what a scandalous travesty.

The bestest Tammany just informed me that I had referred to "Neil Young" as "Neil Diamond" in a past blog saying that "he had so much to say."

Tiffs will hate me for saying this but I do not think that Neil Diamond has much of anything to say or provide beyond cheap entertainment value! It has been changed.

Amusing Conversation

me: fisher

Ethan: david fisher?

me: carrie

11:37 PM Ethan: she is smart and sexy

11:38 PM me: is she?

11:39 PM Ethan: no

me: oh

i liked her in star wars

11:40 PM think she was pretty

i also liked her in that movie where she played the kid who is really good at chess

Ethan: yeah, 30 years ago!

me: searching for carrie fisher

11:41 PM i think

Ethan: no, that was searching for fish n chips

me: no no

11:42 PM youre thinking of goodbye mr fish and chips

11:43 PM Ethan: no, thats goodbye yellow brick road

11:44 PM me: you dont know shite

Ethan: but i know shit from shinola

11:45 PM me: do you know shinola for chinua?

*from

11:46 PM Ethan: i know chinua achebe's heartbreak

me: right bc youre nom de plume is actually chinua achebe

11:47 PM Ethan: my nom de chinua is pom de fleur

me: fruits de la mer

The times they are a changin'

Snork,

It is a pity that we didn't get two votes today whilst voting for the next president. I am technically two people right now, after all. I have 20 fingers and 20 toes. Ah well. Regardless you got to be there to experience one of the most important elections in a very long time and help me paint a bit of blue into this red state. It's funny, when I saw McCain/Palin on the screen it hit me that indeed McCain really meant it when he put Palin on his ticket. I thought until now it was some colossal joke and there would be some respectable name next to his. Ah well. The idea of that woman running the country with her "Putin heads floating in the Alaska that can see Russia from its backyard" in the event that McCain passes to a better place is completely absurd. Anyway, now that I have thoroughly pissed off at least 2 of my readers, I will change the subject....

Piano lessons! I had my second piano lesson today and totally rocked the "Catch A Falling Star" song. Oh yah. I am not sure if piano is your style...I'd think loud electric guitars from your wild dancing, but maybe you will enjoy it anyway. :)



As you can see I am in desperate need of 1) highlights 2) eyebrow wax 3) facial....thank goodness I am will be second trimester on Thursday and I can get my hair done safely! But hey, at least I voted! :)

Mums

The way out is through

Snorkulous,

Daddy left today for "NOla" and will be away until Friday. Boo. In the three months that you have been floating in my core he has had to be gone for a total of 3 weeks, which isn't a lot by any means, but it seems to be getting more and more difficult for me each time. We sat outside at the "koi pond" area of the apartment complex that features a pond with a lily pad, a few green growths, and a continuous pouring of recycled water into the pond from an above trough-like half pipe. Miette perched on the brick around the trough and looked like a beautiful statue. I noticed today that her fawnish color tends to camouflage well with whatever surface she is on. We sat on the nearby wooden benches that don't rock as much as slide and shot the proverbial shit. There has always been something about running water that comforts me and makes me open and talkative. It was nice. Very nice. I've had a slight sense of unexplained panic with Chris's upcoming trip. I don't really know why, as I am pretty much acclimated to his travel and am typically just fine on my own. I think it might just be so much change...you (delightful you), work, school, move, etc. And I also have a pretty profound knowledge that the shifting has just started and things that were once so cornerstone in my life might not be so much anymore. Also, I need to be more proactive about meeting other mom's-to-be, regardless of how much of a misanthrope I tend to be and how much I am anxiously dreading the "culture of parenthood" with its "oh has Hollis (our girl name of the moment) crawled yet? oh wow because John has been crawling for a month and they are the same age!" But like any generalization, there are bound to be oodles of moms that I fit with and who can help ease some isolation or rather, foster shared excitement of what is to come. Because I am so excited about you and I imagine what you will be like and learning from you and picking out pumpkins with you so so much.

So I have been listening to Neil Young a lot. It is funny because throughout so many periods of life I have found myself idly listening to a radio station and having heard a Neil Young song and not really connecting it to him particularly, I have listened mesmerized and then made mental note to look up the song and remember it. But I've always felt somewhat stupid saying "Yeah I Like Neil Young." Why? Um no idea but I do that with a lot of things that seem affectatious for inexplicable reasons. It is comforting to me though that I have extreme consistency when it comes to thinks that are really meaningful to me or that appeal to me on a basic level. I don't really know how to explain what I mean but as an example, there is a rather uneventful piece of piano music that Chris plays occasionally and it has been infrequent enough that I don't recall it immediately but I always go, "This reminds me of the piano in Amelie which reminds me of the color green." I don't realize I've already said this because it just is reactionary and kind of bubbles out. But he always smiles at me and says I always say that when I hear that song.

Anyway so I was listening to "After the Gold Rush" and all the sudden a buried memory of my having burned that very song to play for my father came barreling back as I drove along the "lower deck" of 35 (which always makes me think of Ethan and car accidents and scary stuff and I always look for little white paint marks on the side of the median). I remember I played the song for my dad while in a hotel room in Disney World on one of our little vacations when I was in college. It's a rather bleak and silent song and I remember being worried it sounded silly with his whiny voice amidst all that space. But he listened, me on a lazyboy-like chair and him in an upright one, both drinking wine. He explained some history to me about what he thought the song was about and now I forget. I almost called him to share this memory and see if he remembered it too and it all seemed so urgent and important in that moment. But it was nearing 11 pm EST and didn't do so.

On a tangential note, it is just the greatest hits of Neil Young that I have been listening to but in every song it just comes over me that he actually has something to say. I really think that is a rarity- someone actually having something to say in (in general but I think I appreciate it most in music.) Someone close to me and who I think the world of told me that he doesn't have much to say anymore. It made me sad and I don't really believe it (though I believe that he believes it), but I have to say that most people (myself nonexempt) don't often have much to say either. Nothing truly evocative or original or passionate, at least. Scholars have been saying forever that we are a culture of the apathetic and lazy. Choice after choice creating more and more mental, emotional, and physical sloths. The closest I have seen to a cultural pique in a while is this whole election fandango. But even still it seems that most of the interest is rooted in some sort of youtube-like celebrity to-do and just what is supposed to be at the moment. We have a joke of a GOP vice-presidential nominee and a black presidential hopeful. How can people not be interested as if it is some reality tv show? That being said, I am glad that there is a culture that is shifting in this direction, regardless of the motivating factors, and it is obviously a complex issue with multiple and varied interests at stake.

This sounds curmudgeonly doesn't it? Haha. Well I can be one especially when I am in a sour mood the night of the sabbath. I love you and I am going to go take a bath with some running water and Chris's newest gift of candy corn-shaped soap.

Ma

Happy 11 Week Birthday, Snork!!!

Snork,

I just wanted to write a short entry to say I love you, I've been working hard, and I just saw a really amusing commercial. It is a Kohl's commercial that is not intended to be funny...it showcases all these beatific content people snuggling up with their new Kohl's clothes and under their new Kohl's linens and then all the sudden there's a shot of two playing cards. These two playing cards are a king and a queen card and they reach toward each other and tenderly hold hands between the confines of their cards. It is so absurd but it is supposed to be all heart-warming. Not even a preggo like me that cries while reviewing video advertisements at work about "reclaiming the land" was touched. Though, I just discovered while searching for the commercial on youtube that Kohl's used Iggy Pop's "Passenger" in one of their ads. So that is pretty hip. Which reminds me that I heard "Lucky" by dear Radiohead on some ad for a new tv show. That was super weird. What is up with that? Anyone?

Anyway here is the absurdity (it peaks around 20 seconds):

Daddy picked up burritos and is on his way home. I have days off stretching ahead of me. You are a strapping two inches long. Life is good.

Belly kisses,
Mama

Baby Daddy

Snork,

Grandma Weber obliged and provided Chris with some of his adorable baby photos. So here are some of my favs (some are not the best scan because I couldn't get them out of the frame)


Obligatory wiener shot


Happy arms (see Snork week 8)


Elf with sausage paws


Superhero/child model


Warning: do not operate heavy machinery when under the influence of wonderment


Idyllic


Suspicious hands and angel face


Couldn't get this one out of frame! We will try for better scan later. Grandma McAloon sending pics of me as baby and I'm going to make a little collage. You are going to be so adorable!

Mwah,

Mum

Cowgirl in the sand

Hi Snork,

Thanks for the cruel joke. I am 9.5 weeks along and NOW you decide to make give me morning sickness? Not fair...I thought I was past the danger zone. There I was, cleaning the house (actually it could be the 'nesting' they speak of since I was not able to get anything clean enough and for those who know me I am not by any means a fastidious creature) and wham! Must visit toilet or something I just cleaned will be seriously in need of a second scrubdown. I can't really attribute it to what I ate--I just had a peanut butter and jelly sandwhich (yes I know that word is spelled incorrectly but I like it better that way) and brain juice (there is a Tropicana fruit drink supposedly good for the brain, hum). But I might have had a bit too much too quickly of the brain juice?

Regardless I hope this was my one token encounter with the dreaded MS. I am currently making shepherd's pie...all by my lonesome! Chris is the cook in the family but he is away in NM visiting his folks so I am left to nourish myself, you, and the animals all by meself. I figured that shepherd's pie must be good for us because it has the wholesome ingredients of cow, peas, carrots, onions, corn and shepherd. mmm. We will see if it stays down. I know that my hormone levels are going to peak for the next couple of weeks so I hope this isn't a terrible portension. I also have a bitchin' headache. Not bitchin' in a good way either, Mom (Grandma McAloon and I watched a dog show together over the phone last night and laughed about the announcers talking about the bitches and ended up discussing the uses of the word bitch).

So, events going on. The apartment leaser came by today to apologize. For the last 48 hours the siren death-knoll, air-raid of a fire alarm has been intermittently sounding at very inopportune moments. Like 2.30 am and then 6.30 am. It has been utter hell. I called and left nasty messages that included the f-bomb. I am meeting with the manager of the complex on Friday to discuss compensation for emotional damages.

So this next thing is so Texas. I shot a shotgun! 12-gauge at clay skeet. See, I went to TPWD's Expo and they have guns you can try in an effort to promote hunting. I shot an old Civil War rifle called a muzzle-loader as well, but the shotgun was by far the most memorable. It was the most difficult time to be shooting targets since it was 3 PM and the sun was right in our eyes. And I had never shot a real gun before! But I went up there and shattered 3/3 of the targets! My training guy was completely in awe of me and I swear I felt you spinning in my stomach. Sorry, that must have been loud. The shotgun is super heavy and I was super scared and the shells are about as big as my palm. I was worried about the recoil and it did indeed hurt. The weirdest part about it is that you have to rest you cheek against the gun as you look down the barrel. The skeet shoot out of this machine and you follow it a bit then aim up the lines and pull the trigger. Each of those times the intense suddenness of the shot and the recoil made me completely disoriented, like someone squeezing their eyes shut when careening out of control on ice toward a wall. But I somehow got each one. Amazing considering I had never done it before and I had deliberately selected the three most difficult targets. It was super adrenalizing and scary and I'm glad I did it. I know that I will be handy in the case of Apocalypse or social collapse in providing for our family with my super hunting skills.

Two of the most interesting parts of the day aside from this realization of my shooting prowess involved the bus ride to the expo and the kids I talked to in line. My boss wanted me to ride the bus that was complimentary service from the local mall in an effort to get the true experience of expo. This is my first experience in attending this event. So I grudgingly agreed even though it required more gas to get up and back to the shuttle than simply driving to the expo. But I am glad I did. I was surrounded by a bunch of people but I had my tunes going and I got lost in thought, watching the scenery out the window, nostalgic thinking about myself in so many situations as a younger kid on a bus, staring at the window and thinking about my future and feeling alienated but happy in my world with my thoughts and my music. It was a wonderful full circle to re-enter that feeling from a perspective of having you brewing in my belly, knowing a bit more about the tangible future of you and I and Daddy and all the possibilities of happiness that are our own choosing. I watched the birds lazily floating through the sky and I thought to myself "the next thing I see will be something directly to do with the baby." You know, kind of like those "if i make this light it will be a good day" kind of games. Well the next thing I saw was a car that passed us and it was a Taurus! This is exciting not because I love Fords (I don't) but because you are going to be a Taurus...a little stubborn bull born in May! It was so lovely and a few tears made there way down. The kid next to me asked"are you ok?" having had noticed. "Yeah, it's just a really good song," I said, motioning to my ipod. He nodded like he understood.

In line at the shotgun range there were these two boys, probably sophomores in high school since they were talking about chemistry class. At first I was kind of annoyed by them, they were talking about hunting and da da da. But we ended up conversing a bit and they gave me some tips on shooting and they were super smart and polite. They were talking about all the things they knew about chemistry and the new experiments- total nerds. One of them said "wouldn't it be cool if you could shoot the target and the bullet would go right through the middle making a hole but the rest would remain intact?" and I said "that is sort of like in the movies when they put tape on a window and then shoot it and the window remains intact aside from the hole." He agreed and we talked about how that's not scientifically sound. He then went on to talk about how neat a sheet of glass breaking looks. I asked him about the recoil and he said he was worried about that before but that it didn't hurt as bad as he thought it was going to and it was almost disappointing. He then looked sort of panicky or awkward, like I would think that was a weird thing to say. "Yeah I can see that," I said. Just an hour later I was in the same position as the little kid on the bus, connecting with someone being open.

But yeah, they discussed a lot of typical boy stuff that I think in some ways I was thinking I would dread if I you ended up being a male---violent, hyperactive, etc . But I had forgotten that every time I've been in a group of kids it's always been the boys that I ended up having the most to talk about. When teaching 6th grade it was space and video games and in preschool it was dinosaurs and science. But really it just came down to the individual kids and their imagination and curiosity that really connected me to them. I guess just because it's rare to find people who understand certain things. I've found that kids tend to understand a lot more about a lot of the things I value in life than adults do, regardless of their gender. So it was just interesting. It made me realize that I was being a bit silly compartmentalizing gender into specific roles or habits, and my wanting a girl was making things a bit more two dimensional than they are. You are going to be you and we will experience the world and wonder together. I can't wait to meet you regardless of what you're packing between the legs.

So some pictures and video, there is a backlog:


ACL. Not sure if you can see any huge clouds of pot, but they all wafted straight toward me.


Chris has been gone for a week :( Miette protested and packed her in his suitcase. On the left you see Dad's hairy leg.


Bus to expo. I think this bus seat pattern is the same pattern buses had 15 years ago.


Best outfit ever on this man, who matches the portapotty.


Yah...um..Sprout is really trying to dominate the house now. He got up there himself despite his handicap of cross eyes!

It is not allowing me to upload video right now. I will try again later.

Mwah,

Mum

Jump jump for my love! hehehe

Snork-

So Dr. Weihs was in utter awe of your acrobatic prowess today when we did an ultrasound and saw your dance! Your legs bounced and your arms spun like you were in such joy of trying out your new body. "You have a rock and roll baby!" she exclaimed with wonder. Then when it was time to take your picture, you turned and spread your arms and looked straight at the camera. I can already tell you are going to be one precocious, joyful, handful of love. I love imagining your personality and getting to meet you. We also saw your umbilical cord which looked like glistening little pearls rolling down a tiny tube. I could actually see the pulse! Dr. Weihs said you looked perfect and I agree. Your heartbeat was around 160 as you jumped about jubilant.



I hug you back, little one.

Mama so tired. Loving her new job though. More to come.