The Day's Stream of Consciousness

1) It's morning time for realz? What is that sound? A seagull? Wait, I'm in landlocked Texas. Oh, that is the baby crying. I see. What does the baby want? Food. (nudge male) It's his turn right? Right.

2) Holy crap what time is it? Almost 11 pm! Oh how I love love love that man of mine and his Saturday excursions with the boy to breakfast and the playground. Why is it I can nap but I can't sleep at night anyway?

3) Why isn't Chris answering my texts or the phone? Something awful must have happened. My request for him to bring me home Dippin Dots surely warranted a reply? The baby must have fallen and lost an eye on the playscape. Panic. Panic.

4) They are here. Oh thanks goodness. Oh no, an overtired baby. Please sleep. Please?

5) He brought a slice of pizza but no Dippin Dots. 7 out of 10. At least this garlic roll makes his enviable trip to the movie theatre to watch the World Cup and drink beer palatable. Wait what is that sound? The baby! It has been 45 mins of nap, not his best. Uh oh, that is not a good recharge. I see grouchiness ensuing.

6) Look at that kid shake his butt to the Beatles. He's fantastic. He's my utter world.

7) Why am I being yelled at by my world? Let's go swing and play at the water table. Must get bug spray. Must make sure bug spray is applied to all areas due to tenacious mosquitos. Should I put the sunscreen on before or after the bug spray? I can never figure this out?

8) I am going to have TWO of these guys. That is awesome. Wait that is going to be so freaking hard! How do people get through the doors with a double stroller? How will I nurse Casey with Holden running about? How how how?

9) I have less than 4 weeks to my due date. WTF.

10) Chris is definitely tipsy after the World Cup viewing. Totally not fair. Is he really mowing the lawn? Nice. MUI: mowing under the influence.

11) At the park and enjoying watching my son and his father play in the fountain. Wait, Did that guy really just let his two huge labs run into the park kid's splash fountain, drink the water, and shake their hair dirt and bugs all over the place? Yes he did. "That's freaking gross" did I say that aloud? Yeah I did. And wtf there is even a sign that says 'no pets allowed. Good work asshole. Time to take the boys home.

12) Grouchy boy, tired man. Feed them. Put the smallest to bed.

13) Why is my little gnome so upset??? This cry seems weird. It is either super tired or super pained. But the tone is one I don't recognize. Maybe it is both? It seems to be somewhat rhymthic in its undulations. Oh what if he ate something indigestible during the day and he's bleeding internally? What if it's just teeth? Teething drops, Orajel. Oh it worked. Thank you god for small favors.

14) It is Saturday night and I find myself itching to clean. Back is hurting. Do I really want to sweep and Wetjet? Why yes, yes I effin DO!

15) Is that a FLY on my glistening Swiffered floor? Oh hellllllll no. Why why why must summertime in Texas be full of such nasty pests just waiting to invade your home? Must kill.

16) Ouch. back. make sad face to appeal to male's protective instincts. There we go, there is that footrub.

17) Which is more of a bitch to put back on? The duvet or the Snoogle's pillowcase? Inquiring minds want to know.

18) Ahhh sweet bed. Sweet new book "Her Fearful Symmetry" given to me by sweet sister. And a sweet cuddle to watch "Shutter Island" otherwise affectionally known as "Shitter Island."