Meet Casey Finn (or Grasshopper, or Tron, or Shrub, or bat)! Our newest little addition who arrived at 39 weeks, 0 days. He was born at 2:43 pm, 7 lbs 14 oz and 20.5 inches. Same exact gestation and length as his big brother.
just born
sleeping in a heap
few days old in elf hat
with daddy today
Dancing with Grandma Rita
with grandma mcaloon
Passed out on Grandpa McAloon
listening to daddy play guitar
Casey Finn is two weeks old tomorrow. The time has gone by so quickly, even for people in a newborn haze. Our new little one is the most
observative, agreeable little baby I've met. Although he wants to be held by mama all the time, or rather, snuggled into my boob. Yes, we are doing the breastfeeding thing this time, and although it makes sleeping at night much easier and infinitely cozier
(he sleeps next to me and when he wakes up hungry I can pull him close to eat then go back to bed), it means pain. Oh the pain. And today I went to the doctor due to weird consistent fevers and was told I have mastitis. But apparently it is supposed to become routine and non-painful sometime soon according to all the other
milkcows so I grit my teeth and wait for the payoff. We've already saved a bundle on formula just in these two weeks though, and the bond between the two of us is surprisingly solid for two people who just met two weeks ago. So to summarize:
Benefits of formula:
- no boobage bondage (have yet to feed him in public this will be nipped in bud soon)
- no boobage torture (aside from the few days of engorgement when milk comes in)
- you can look baby in eyes when feeding
- a lot easier for daddy to share in feedings and bonding
- sleep longer periods because takes longer to digest
Benefits of breastfeeding:
- weight loss (t-minus 20 lbs as of today)
- sleeping at night (if you have the nerve to cosleep. it still freaks me out)
- bonding and oxytocin
- free
- no hassle of bottles
Looking at the list, I can see why they are pretty even in terms of benefits. With Holden he was such an
assman that he wanted nothing to do with the boob. So two months
breastmilk he got then the duty was happily over. The child has yet to get an ear infection and is beautiful and brilliant. This time around Casey screamed for boob the second he was born and latched on like a champ. I plan to do it this route for 6 months.
Soooo, onto the birth story.
The night of July 1st the
Webers came over for fondue. They had been in town helping us since June 28
th due to my being 3 cm and thinking
i'd pop any moment. Thank god for them; they have helped us immeasurably with Hbomb.
As you might recall, I had Melting Pot the night before Holden was born (in which the song "
holden back the years" played in
serendepitious fashion) so I thought that between the walking that day and the fondue that night, I was sure to go into labor the following day.
Chris had a pineapple ready for me as well. So we went to bed with my feeling completely fine and refreshed. I awoke at 3 am with strong period cramps. Similar to what I had been feeling all week and completely manageable, but still strong enough to wake me up and get my attention. I laid in bed for a few minutes, trying to decide if it was worth it to wake Chris up. I almost went back to sleep but then noticed that I was completely 100% awake. I am never awake at this hour, particularly after going to bed only 2 hours prior, and it was because of this that I woke up Chris with a nudge and a simple "we need to go." He sat up like a dead person suddenly and violently resurrected, and the clamor to get moving started. I took a shower, he started throwing his last minute items into our bag and of course donned his labor shirt:
He called the emergency line for the OB and they gave us the green flag to the hospital (uh
yah, I was already going anyway) and awoke the
Webers from their fondue dreams. They bent the laws of physics to get here in about 5
mins time from a distance of 10
mins away if going 5-10 mph over the speed limit. Rita was excited. David seemed to have consumed 10 cups of coffee in the drive over and joined Chris in the mad shuffle to get things into the car. I will never forget the look on his face when I said "oh ouch, we need to go" while standing there at the doorway. I thought he was literally going to throw me into the car to get me to the hospital. Before I left I went into Holden's room. He was laying on his side in his usual position, spooning his blanket. I pet his head and whispered to him that I love him and he would always be my first baby. I took a mental picture of the last time I would see him as my only child. And off we went.
Oh how many times we had driven to our routine appointments and imagined what it would be like driving that strip of highway while in labor (hoping we wouldn't need to be induced!). It was so dark and surreal and we knew it was going to be a long long night. We arrived at our lovely brand new hospital 5
mins later (yes, it was a far cry from the 25
mins down major hwy in rush hour traffic that was
holden's birth) and go to registration desk. The freaking bimbos at the front took about 20
mins trying to fix some computer error that apparently made it impossible to book us into one of the rooms. I ended up snapping at her and was given "oh poor contraction pregnant lady" looks from the woman in the waiting room. Finally I was wheeled upstairs like an invalid and placed into our beautiful room. Casey's box and warming station were already there waiting for him.
Everything in the room was expectant for his impending arrival...like I was having a baby or something. Wait, I was.
Yah, I never believe it till I see it. It was pouring rain outside, another day in a series of weird weather patterns on the tail end of a tropical storm and daily thunderstorms. My entire pregnancy I imagined Casey as this little tempestuous, artistic type. Sensitive and moody. The fact that he was choosing to be a rider on the storm suited this image perfectly. So I was hooked up to the annoying machines that are constantly malfunctioning and screaming and the nurse told me that I was having contractions, but they were not THAT strong so there was a good chance I would be sent home. She then checked for dilation and informed me that I was a good 5 cm dilated. She looked utterly shocked that I was still able to speak and smile in this condition, and said she would speak to the attending physician to see if I would be admitted. She returned a few minutes later speaking of paperwork and things and I had to stop her mid-sentence..."So...I am being admitted?" I asked. "Yes, you are having a baby today," she said. Chris and I looked at one another with a powerful mixture of awe and fear and joy and I realized that I then knew my baby would be born on July 2
nd. What a lovely beautiful day.
(yah my face got cut off here but he looks so cute)
So I asked them to give me my epidural ASAP as things were starting to actually kind of hurt, and the nurse (who wasn't my most favorite person as she reminded me of a
snarky cheerleader with a fake smile) told me "I would live" in a kind voice about having to wait for the penicillin (yes,
gbs positive so I was being doped up to kill bad flora) to run into my body. I think that was an excuse but whatever. She was replaced soon enough by a much better nurse (who has 6 kids and takes her two youngest to our neighborhood park to catch frogs!) and my epidural came and was administered by an appropriately nerdy doctor. After having two epidurals I still can't properly describe how strange they feel. It feels the same way as when you push a needle into a thick pincushion, kind of resistant and crunchy, only it's your body and it's being done to you. After the epidural I was all sorts of happy and loopy. My entire lower body was warm and
numbish. We put on our labor
playlist Chris made which included "Disintegration"
Radiohead's "Reckoner" and Enigma and was perfect for the dark stormy weather! We listened to music and tried to get some much-needed rest in before the big moment came.
Around 8
amish I had an unexpected surprise from my very own doctor! I always thought I'd be delivering
afterhours but this time I lucked out and was going to have a Friday afternoon baby. He said he would definitely be there for me and that he hadn't expected to see my name on his list (there were apparently a ton of planned c-sections that day) but wasn't completely shocked either due to the 3 cm 5 days prior. Things were pretty uneventful up until push time. The entire time between I was worried about the epidural not working on the left side because I was much less numb on that side, but things were fine. And there was a blip toward the end where I wasn't progressing from a 9 to a 10 for about two hours, which was strange because of how fast I was going on my end prior. But in the end Dr.
Mointero came back in, announced me as a 10, and I was ready to push.
I was so intent on making this experience different from my first, in that I did not want a combined 5 hours of pushing, that I ended up being superwoman pusher. The nurse was quite excited about my
enthusiasm even though I knew I was pooing and that couldn't be exciting to clean up. There was this moment when I first pushed that I just KNEW a poo was coming about and the nurse and Chris were just watching it's arrival.
Yah...I had to pretend that wasn't going on to continue the
doody at hand. About 10
mins into the pushing the nurse exclaimed "look at all that dark hair!" and I couldn't help but laugh despite the horrible pain. I always teased Chris that we'd have this dark skinned/haired baby because I dated mainly non whiteys before him. So the dark hair thing was unexpected. Both that he had hair at all, and that it was dark. A few minutes later she told me to stop pushing so she could get Dr.
Mointero. And in his
sauntered (why do
OBs take forever to get their darn scrubs on and move on up to the
vag?) and told me I could push. I few pushing and I heard him say "Kelly, look down at your baby." Now this was by far the most amazing part of the labor and delivery experience, and I think god that my OB was cool enough to do this for me because I would never have known to ask him to. He basically held up Casey for me to see as he was still halfway in my body. Sounds weird, but he had already turned so basically was just still partway in by his legs. I was able to look at him, bloody, gooey, rodent-like, crying with a twisted up angry face, still part of me and of course 100% him. It was incredible. I was balling like I'd never done this before and Chris was too. The moment when you and your partner look at each other after seeing your new baby is unlike any moment you will ever have again. Even if it's your second, third, baby. It is the most unique, cherished moment that stands on its own as a noble gas of sorts. They put him on my chest and I held his
yuckiness close to mine. They left him on me for quite a while then took him to be warmed and wrapped up. Chris took a bunch of pictures and buzzed with excitement that my guesses that the baby would be his
doppelganger were accurate.
They gave him back to me and he screamed for boob and the love affair began. When we were moved to recovery finally I
collapsed into Chris's arms with relief that we had two beautiful healthy children and that the experience delivering Casey was so beautiful and perfect. We stayed there until July 4, when we were discharged into the world. I was more than ready to go home. Just feeling the hot breeze on my face after being wheeled out to the car (yes they make you ride in that damn wheelchair out too) made me feel like a free creature.
So here we are, two weeks later. The
Webers have come and gone (Rita, angel she is, slept on our couch for a few days to give us extra help), my parents have come and gone (they were incredibly loving and helped so much with Holden I am so grateful and luck) and I have already had to return to the darn doctor for antibiotics for mastitis. Chris went into work today for a 6 hours stint leaving me alone with the boys for the longest period of time I've had yet. It was a bit of a madhouse. Casey is a completely consolable, easygoing child...as long as
i'm holding him. With the Bomb that is a bit difficult. We are all learning. And tonight I received a wonderful present from one of my leading men. I gave Holden his entire dinner/bath/book/song routine for the first time in quite a while (Chris has been doing the heavy lifting for that part of the day and it's made me feel so guilty and like I have ruined my relationship with Holden by not being around him enough) and after his book I asked him for a hug (not expecting it...he is always all over the place these days, not wanting to be tied down
haha) and he immediately laid down, put his entire body into it, and laid like that while I sang him "Silent Night" - the song I sang to him in the womb and as an infant. He must have laid there with his arms wrapped around my neck and his face buried in my shoulder for 20
mins as tears silently fell down my cheek and I thanked the divine for this moment and this blessing. He finally sat up and I said "Oh thank you for that hug, thank you." And he curled up and laid back down on me and cooed. Really, cooed like a baby. He is so young and I know he doesn't get the entire baby thing with Casey and what his place is and where that leaves him in the mix, but he knows that I am his Mama and he is my Baby and as it should be.
Love,
The cracked-nipple, madly-in-love, mother of two.
ps we have a ton more pics these are just iphone ones.
